Thank you to the many who prayed for me yesterday concerning the taping of the CD with Steve Arterburn about “coaching.” I was pretty nervous, and spent much time preparing and worrying and praying! Lol
Let me give you the blow by blow of what went down yesterday...
I had emailed an outline to Steve a couple of weeks ago and asked for his feedback. I wanted some sense of what he would want to focus on. I never heard back. A couple of days before the taping I emailed him and said I would like to do a role play with a real or fake situation to show people what coaching was really like. I never heard back. In fact, no one ever spoke to me at all about anything related to the CD except that we would do one. Not what it would be like, what Steve likes and doesn't like in these things, what the main purpose of doing the CD was going to be, etc. Not good for someone who doesn't tolerate ambiguity very well!! So I did my best to try and prepare for anything and everything... Have you ever tried that?
The day before the taping I emailed my contact at New Life in California to verify day, time, location, and a contact at the station I was supposed to go to. Here is the response I got. “Yes we are still on. WAYL in St. Augustine is the station. David Oglesby is the general manager. 904-641-**** is his number.“ Ok, good. That was settled. I didn't want to make some kind of stupid mistake that would mess up the whole event. Like being late for an interview because you got lost or something.
As I was praying that morning I thought I heard God trying to reassure me, and also tell me that there would be something surprising come of this experience. Something I wouldn't have thought of ahead of time.
I called David Oglesby earlier in the morning, just to double check all the information with him. He was in a meeting and the receptionist said she would have him call me.
I was nervous all morning, and did some busy work. I left at 11am, even though the taping didn't start until 1pm. Again, trying to minimize the possibility of confusion and mistakes.
I called a couple of friends while I was driving to have them pray for me. While talking to one of them I got a call from David. I said, “I'm on my way to Saint Augustine. I hope that's the right place.” He said, “No, you should be coming to our studio in Jacksonville!” So, I turned around and he gave me directions. My obssessiveness had paid off. He asked, “Is Larry Sonnenburg with you?” I was confused, and said, “No.” “Oh that's who we were told was coming.” I said, “Well I'm sure Larry would be quite surprised to hear he was expected at your station to do a CD about coaching, since he's New Life's CEO and is in Laguna Beach, California!” He laughed. “So what's your name? Don... ____?” (I guess the receptionsist's translation of my name got jumbled somewhere along the way.) We toyed with a few possible variations on my name and I finally said, “Double D will be fine.” We chatted for a few minutes about the radio station shakeup in Jacksonville this week. 106.5 The Promise had just been sold. They had the largest Christian audience in town. This station, 88.1 The River, decided to capture that audience by changing their format to all music, like The Promise had been, and by now calling themselves 88.1 The Promise. I thought David was very nice, and taking an unusual amount of time with me, being General Manager and all.
I got there about 12:30 and David was in the hall and introduced me to another guy, Calvin. Here's a picture of David.
Here's a picture of Calvin.
David showed me the studio where I would be doing the recording. An L shaped table with a sound board on one arm of the L, and a bunch of junk mail and CD's and stuff piled on the other. A typical “boom” mike. A tall bar stool with wheels on the bottom. Besides that there was a small love seat and a bunch of electronic equipment. There was a large window in the wall that adjoined the studio where they did the announcing from and I could see a blonde woman in there putting on headphones and talking sometimes.
I said I needed to use the restroom. The staff were joking saying, “We have a saying here. 'If I don't go, who will?'” lol. The bathroom smelled interesting. There was an Oust fan on the counter that wasn't whirling. I picked it up and it said “On.” Must have had dead batteries. There were two light switches by the door. There was a sign with an arrow pointing to one of them that said, “Never turn off the fan!” Apparently they have an odor circulation problem! (I know. tmi)
David got on the phone with Terry at New Life in California and started talking about technical stuff that went way over my head.
I looked around the station for awhile. All the plaques for one thing or another. Autographed pictures of Christian musicians and speakers.
I had prepared a lot of notes, spread out under different topics, across 8 pages. (Somehow you're not surprised, are you?) Given the cluttered set up of the L counter I began wondering just where I would sit, see the papers, and be by the microphone. I did some stretching, and some deep breathing, and sat on the love seat and closed my eyes.
Terry called about 5 minutes before 1pm and said, “David, is there any way we could push this thing back an hour? They double-booked Steve!” “No,” David says. We've got a lot going on today.” I'm beginning to think that I may get a reprieve, and had some mixed feelings about it. Kind of like when you've crammed for a final and you wake up and see all the snow and wonder if school will be cancelled. Euphoria at not having to face the test. Reality that you will have to go through the whole prepaaratory anxiety again in the future! I didn't freak. I believed that God was in control, one way or the other. Terry says, “I'll see what we can do. I'll call you back.” David leaves the room and comes back a few minutes later and calls Terry. “I guess we can do it in an hour after all. I thought we were busy, but we're not.” “You sure that won't be a problem?” “No, except we got this guy, Doug, sitting here.” I assured him I would be just fine. “Another hour to be nervous,” I thought.
David says to me, “Hey I'm gonna go grab a bite to eat in a few minutes. Wanna come?” “Sure. I'm not hungry, but I'll come.” The last thing I need at this point is something in my digestive tract! “OK, I got a couple things to finish up first and I'll be back.” I did some more stretching, walking around, sitting on the love seat with my eyes closed. I practiced praying in my mind. (Usually I can only pray well if I write it out, or say it out loud.)
About 1:30 I decided to see if I could set up the area in a way that I could access my notes well and have access to the microphone. I asked Roger, the Operations Manager, if we could clear off the clutter from one of the arms of the L. He started picking up piles and putting them on the floor. I noticed on top there were two small packages from New Life. I pointed them out and asked if they might be something we would need related to the recording. “Oh, they're probably for the sunspots.” (There are a couple of weeks during the year when New Life Live can't be Live because of sunspots causing interference in the satelite link, or some such thing. So New Life records a whole bunch ahead of time and sends them out to the stations on CD's for them to play during the usual live time. The audience doesn't know the difference. It still sounds live.) Once the arm of the L was cleared off I spread my papers out and tried to arrange them in some logical order so I would be able to quickly refer to them as the conversation progressed. I also wrote the major topics in BIG letters so I could spot them easily. It's hard to scan through information in the middle of an active conversation. I extended the microphone boom and it reached just fine.
Roger came in and starting working on the technical set-up. Roger is the Operations Manager. Here is a picture of Roger.
I asked Roger what an Operations Manager was. He told me that his main job was to make sure the station ran well when no one was there... from like 6pm to 6am and most of the week-end. It goes into automated mode at that point, playing songs, commercials, etc. Apparently, there were other duties that Roger would really like to perform, but “the General Manager likes to do those things.” I asked who the General Manager was. “Calvin.” Ok, so David wasn't the General Manager after all. No wonder he had so much time for me! I guess he is more of a marketing/advertising guy. I think he also does the morning show.
Roger got on the phone with Terry and they were talking in a language that I never learned in school! They tested various things out, I had to put on headphones and talk into a mic. I had to say whether I could hear the other person in the headphones or not.Roger says, “California is only going to be hearing you through the speakerphone of this phone, so you'll have to try to get as close to it as you can. And I see you have your notes all over there.” Suffice it to say that my notes and the phone were at opposite ends of the L. The best laid plans... Roger tried to stretch the cord on the phone to bring it closer to my notes. Little success. So, I gathered my notes up into 2 piles and brought them as close to the center as I could. Then I tried to sit in the middle so I could be somewhat close to the speakerphone on the right and the notes on the left. Why didn't I put the notes right in front of me? Well, the big mic with that large black screen over it has to be in front of your face. Kind of blocks a lot of your visual space...
The time finally came. I heard Steve in my headphones. He was asking someone in the background, “Is this a Perspectives CD?” Hmmm... that didn't give me confidence that he had put a whole lot into preparing for this event that was huge in my world. He then asked me, “Doug, how do you want to be introduced?” Huh? That was the first curve ball. How did I want to be introduced? I joked and said, “President.” Oh well. I've always wanted to do stand-up, lol. Finally I said, “This is Doug Doan, one of New Life's coaches.” Pretty spectactular, ain't it? He asked me if I was ready and I said I was. This is Steve.
“Hi, this is Steve Arterburn with a New Life Perspectives CD.” Then he went on with something about how if Jimmy Connors needs a tennis coach at 50 years old, wouldn't all of us benefit from having someone help us with guidance and advice through our lives. That made me a little nervous, since coaching has little to do with giving people guidance and advice. Then came the next curve ball. “Doug, what do you find is the reason most people are resistant to the idea of coaching?” I didn't have a clue. I talk to people who want it. That's why they are referred to me! And most of them have no clue what coaching is. They just assume it's phone counseling. So I said the first thing that came to my mind, “Education. They are just not aware that it exists, or what it is, or why they would use it.”
Then Steve says, “Why don't we do a role play.” I thought, great. At least we can get into something I'm familiar with. Then he goes on to say that the biggest concern in his life right now is his daughter turning 16 soon, starting to date, and not keeping good physical intimacy boundaries with her date. Oh boy... Couldn't he have picked a less sensitive issue??? lol. Oh my god... Especially to go out to thousands of people? Plus, it's not really a great coaching topic. It's more of a counseling topic. Well I jumped in and started talking to him like I would any of my clients. I got into it, and kept asking probing questions. I was animated, talking with my hands, being quite expressive. Apparently, we got to deep, because he stopped me and reminded me of the purpose of the CD. (Like, do people really want to know this?) We picked up again, and he got to the point where he admitted that he had gotten a lot more clarity about things that would help him be more reassured than he had been before, etc. We didn't get to the part where I actually helped him come up with concrete action steps to help make sure those good intentions turned into reality. But I think the role play part had gone on long enough.
I almost never referred to my notes, because either he was asking me questions that I wasn't prepared for, or I couldn't find the right notes quickly enough. A couple of times that it would have been good to find them was when he asked, “What are the most common topics people come to coaching for?” and, “Give us an example of a great success story.” I had things prepared for both of those questions, but couldn't find the appropriate notes quickly enough. So I winged it. To me it sounded either stupid or just plain wrong.
When the CD was over Steve said thanks and I said, “I enjoyed it. I can't say I wasn't nervous though!” He said, “Thanks for the great work you're doing,” or something to that effect, and he was gone.
I took the headphones off and I was alone in the room. I went and got someone and told them I was done. They came in and called David and he told them how to stop the taping on the laptop. I walked out of the door and into my car, which was quite hot from the son. Felt good though. Warm. Real. Back into the real world. Got that over with. I started driving toward church where I had to do a couple hours of custodial work. Along the drive I started having PTSD. Why didn't I say this? Why didn't I say that? People aren't going to have a very solid understanding of coaching. Steve is pissed that I got too deep in the role play. Why didn't he chat with me more before or after the taping? What are people going to think? Etc. etc. etc.
After I was done at the church I went to Blockbuster and rented a DVD of The Office and watched all 6 episodes, including all the “deleted scenes” and commentary. I woke up the next day feeling normal again. I wasn't real happy with the result. But I thought I did very well for what I was given.
Well folks... that's a glimpse of my brief “life in the fast lane.” It's good to be back at my computer.
