Anxiety

Anxiety is never about something that has happened, or is happening. It is always about something that might happen in the future.

Review of Barlowgirl concert

I went to a concert with my kids of the Christian band Barlowgirl. It's 3 teenage sisters who sing and play guitar and drums. It followed a baseball game and fireworks at Christ's Church night at the Jacksonville Suns.

Although the music was ok, I was disquieted by a couple of things. The theme verse that they pounded home to the complicit crowd was Romans 12:1,2.

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." (NIV)

Now, I think it's great that they want to offer their bodies to God, to not conform to this world, and to renew their minds... However, the three practical examples they gave of how to live that out made me uneasy.

First, don't date. Apparently, they have studied the scriptures and decided that it's not OK to date. In fact, they have a song that says, "I'm not dating, I'm just waiting." Although I haven't delved into their detailed explanation of why this is such a bad practice (if they have one), I am quite concerned that any teenager who goes on a date will think of themselves as a less-than-perfect Christian. And what does waiting mean? When do you wait until? Until you arrive at the church door in your wedding gown and discover that day who God has picked out for your spouse? What about arranged marriages? Is that OK? It makes my head hurt... I understand they were influenced by this book.

Second, they adjured the crowd to not dress as the world dresses, "And you know some of the fashions out there girls..." While I'm all for modesty, I had to laugh that the first thing I thought of when they came on stage was how their dress, make-up, bling, etc., was indistinguishable from the "world." I remember thinking that if my mother was there I would probably have had a hard time convincing her this was a Christian concert. So, we are not to dress like the world, but who decides what is "worldly" or not? Barlowgirl? Apparently, with the dyed hair, tight ratty jeans, t-shirts, bangles, and low-slung guitars, you've got a lot of wiggle room, lol. Oh, I see on their site they have a page dedicated to the clothing companies they endorse. Hmmm...

Lastly, they each told a story of how they had dreams to do such and such with their life but they gave it up to be in this band, because God had called them to it. Not only is that a dreary way to look at surrendering your life to God, I could help but think of the actual gifts and talents God had given them that were being supressed, since their musical skills were just "ok." A quote on their web site says, "We gave God our dreams. And now we go on stage every night saying, We don't know why we are here, but we know You put us here for a purpose."

So, they're a cute band, out of the mainstream, and I think have the right intentions and passion at least. I just hope they aren't too successful with their message, and that they tack on some maturity soon! :)

On the positive side, all 3 of kids liked their music (even my 16 year old son who usually doesn't like anything except screaming). And I like some of their songs, too. For example,

• "Psalm 73" (My God's Enough) is one of my daughter Olivia's favorite songs. Passionate and sour.
• "Never Alone" Sorrowful harmonies in minor key, a la Evanesence
• "No One Like You" is a high-energy statacco-lyric song, a la Avril LaVigne

I think their forte is the strong harmonies on the slower, powerful, minor-key anthems.

Phillipians 1:6

I was finishing up a coaching session on the phone with someone today and prayed for them. At the end of my prayer I said, "And God we know that you will continue to do that work in her because you promised that 'You, who began a good work in her will complete it, until the day of Jesus Christ.'"

About a minute later, while I was still on the phone with her, I glanced at a new email that had come in from a neighbor. A very short email. But at the bottom, in red, was this.

Be Blessed today and Always!!

Philippians 1:6 states, “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Don’t be afraid, reserved, or insecure. Be confident in what God has deposited in you. Believe in your purpose and in your call. Stand by your passion and believe that it will manifest.

Coincidence? Perhaps.

But as Archbishop William Temple notes, the coincidences occur much more frequently when he prays.

I wish I had thought of that!

After debating whether to go up and refill my coffee at Panera's or whether I should first ask to see if it was allowed, I decided to go with my conscience and ask first. I was told it was fine.

When I left the bakery I saw a real fancy looking woman getting out of her car and heading to Panera's... In her hand was an empty Panera's styrofoam coffee cup. Dang. I shoulda kept my cup! lol

Commercials I like (or don't)

Kinda Cute but tries too hard

Budweiser's "Real men of genius"

Kinda good but used too much

Capital One's "No. No. No. No. No." (repeat ad infinitum) Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't.

"Gotchas"

energizer bunny -"they just keep running and running"
geicko-"no. i saved a bunch of money on my car insurance..."

Have started fad phrases

"Whoops. I coulda hada v8"
"I can't believe i ate the whole thing"
"Whazzup????"
"Where's the beef?"

Memorable jingles

"oh what a feeling"
"i'd like to teach the world to sing"
"have it your way"
"you deserve a break today"
"winston tastes good, like a cigarette should."
"For all you do... this bud's for you"

Completely annoying

Prescription medicne ads that quote a textbook full of possible side effects and try to make it sound good, while butterflies and fair-faced maidens are lilting through meadows in slow motion.

Whoever thought that would work?? (But it did.)

The first few Burger King ads with the guy in the King mask. For some reason these ones crack me up. Especially the one where the guy wakes up in bed and the king is there with him.

Sprint's "Stickin it to the man." This one makes me laugh every time, even though I know every line. Polished dialogue, pauses, facial expressions, follow-ons, and inuendos.

Cutest Girls

Krystals

Riveting

Itunes -where the person is walking, but his/her shawdow is dancing. Very cool.

Understatement of the year

“Genital herpes can really be a hassle.”

Guilty pleasures

Things I like but don't mention in public, or church, or work, etc.

Barry Manilow
Kelley Clarkson
Shrek
Princess Di
Bill Clinton's intellect
Pulp Fiction
The Last Temptation of Christ
America's Funniest Home Videos
The early Billy Joel

My favorite dilberts... #1

(Click cartoon to expand)

My favorite Dilberts # 2

(Click cartoon to expand.)

My favorite Dilbert's # 3

(Click cartoon to expand.)

Things that really BUG me

• At a certain point my fingernails get to a length where they really bother me. And then I can't find clippers anywhere in the house.


• Daisy Fuentes on America's Funniest Videos is so cute that it makes me want to watch, but she acts so dumb that I have to change the channel.


• Jay Leno doesn't give the audience enough time to respond to his jokes, before he starts talking again. Like he's uncomfortable with the silence. Drives me nuts. (He should take a lesson from Mr. Letterman.)


• Whenever I'm typing the word "internet" my auto-spell-check capitalizes it. (Internet) Why??? It's not a proper noun.


• People who say, "blah, blah, blah" all the time.
• Diane Reams' voice
  
  

My mom's birthday

My mother turned 70 a couple of days ago. Seems old...

In a good way.

My goals for 2006

GOALS FOR 2006

Develop a network of 12 men friends, develop an "inner circle" of 3 men, create or join a men's prayer group, build and strengthen my relationship with my Father.

Go on a trip with Justin to celebrate his 16th birthday, learn ways to connect more deeply with my daughter Olivia, go fishing with Rebecca 3 times

Get mentors/accountability partners for:
· Food
· Fitness
· Finances
· Spirituality
· Parenting
· Job/career
· Life Purpose
· Sex and women
· Dating
· Organization
· Making amends/restitution

Figure out what I need in a “Life Mentor”


Define my…
· purpose
· mission
· vision
· goals
· values
· passions
· personal strengths
· personal weaknesses
· skills and talents
· knowledge
· experience
· assetts
· liabilities

Do indepth studies on:
· Abraham
· "word of knowledge"
· The gift of tongues (i.e., prayer language)
· What did the New Covenant actually change? What relation do we have to the Old Covenant laws today?

Begin designing a web site. Publish at least the "links" section, find a technical person who will help me do the development for the web site

Write reviews of 1 book, 1 CD, and 1 movie and post them on amazon.com

Develop a list of 10 articles to write, with at least a skeleton outline including:
· Title
· Theme
· Scripture
· main points
· illustrations

Write reviews of 1 book, 1 CD, and 1 movie and post them on amazon.com

Have a definite "plan" for giving, develop a positive cash flow, find inexpensive ways to print quality digital pictures and frame them, Get an mp3 player, find a headset that works well with my cell phone.

My current food staples

GRAINS

• Whole Grain Bread: I get regular sliced loaves, as well as whole loaves from bakeries. Many packages that say "whole wheat" or "whole grain" are not 100%. You have to check the ingredients. If it says "enriched flour" in the list, that's not whole grain.
• Low-fat triscuits: A good crunchy/salty alternative to chips. They are whole grain. Incidentally, the low-fat have the same calories as the regular!
• Whole Grain Cereal. There's a lot of these coming out now. Check the ingredients to be sure. Cereal with soy milk and a little Splenda or lite maple syrup on top is a good snack.

VEGIES:

• Cooked vegetables.... cabbage, potatoes, onions, broccoli, rutabaga, etc.
• Often I add a bag of frozen veggies, i.e., "winter mix." Speaking of which... canned vegetables are horrible tasting and typically have a lot of sodium. Fresh is best. But frozen is a good medium. Tastes fresh. Easy to prepare. Keep long. No sodium.
• Raw vegetables are great nibblers.

MEATS

• Skinless turkey and chicken. Pre-made turkey burgers are easy to cook.
• Fish - any, as long as not battered or fried. Tuna fish is quick, but high sodium.

FRUIT

• Apples are always tasty and easy to prepare and easily portable.
• As with veggies, frozen fruit is a good compromise between fresh and canned. I get frozen berry mix, which i then can add to cereal, or mix with yogurt, or whatever. Frozen peaches are good too.

DRINKS

• Coffee - I usually have one cup a day. If i have a second, it's usually decaf. Of course it's Starbucks French Roast, made with a coffee press...
• Water - I usually have it with me at all times, whenever I feel thirsty. I have a Brita filter on my kitchen faucet which works real good and avoids lugging hundreds of pounds of bottled water into my house.
• Non-alcoholic beer - I love the taste, has few calories (about 50), and is healthy (basically grains and water). I especially like it when it's hot out or if I've just exercised.
• Red wine - I occasionally have it with a meal, or late in the evening instead of junk food. The experts tout the health benefits of this practice fairly consistently. I usually only need 2-4 ounces to satisfy the taste, and to have a mild sedative effect. Much more than that and I begin slipping into a state of less mental and physical acuity than I want or need. I can't seem to drink a whole bottle before it goes bad.
• Diet soda - I don't drink it very often, because usually I prefer one of the above drinks. However, it does "hit the spot" sometimes. Caffeine free.

DAIRY

• Non-fat cottage cheese (makes good dip for triscuits!)
• Non-fat plain yogurt. You've got to mix it with something else. For sure...
• Low-fat plain soy milk. A great alternative to milk. I use it a lot for cereal and cooking.

MISCELLANEOUS

• Tofu: great with vegetables or with just soy sauce or hot sauce or salsa
• Eggs: I do not think they are the devil (although they may be deviled)
• Salsa: Great with triscuits, added to scrambled eggs, mixed with refried beans, as a dip
• Corn tortillas: I'm not talking about chips. I'm talking about the round things that you use to make burritos, etc. The corn ones usually come in a bag. I get a bag of 100. You have to cook them briefly in a frying pan before eating. (You can cheat and put in wet paper towel in microwave.) They are basically just corn and water. Whole grain. Low fat. Most other types of shells are high fat and use refined flour.
• Refried beans: I buy a bunch of different kinds of beans, put them in my crock pot, and in about 3 or 4 hours they're done... just mash them up. Use them for dip (mixed with salsa), or to put in the corn tortillas mentioned above. They have zero taste, so you have to put something on them if you want any flavor. Sometimes I use garlic salt.
• Lite maple syrup - nice pick-me-up on cereal. Not too much.
• Splenda - good topping instead of sugar (I don't scared too easily by all the hype that surrounds any new product. Sugar has lots of verifiable negative side effects, and the artificial sweeteners have been studied extensively and no one's quite sure.)
• Garlic salt - tastes great, go easy
• Low-fat or fat-free dressings - Be sure to check calories... 40-60 calories per 2T. Use it as a garnish. Don't drown the salad. Just get some taste on there. Fat free blue cheese dressing is really good. Also, you can get fat free mayonaise. Saves tons of calories.

Quotes of famous people

"Don't worry about avoiding temptation... as you grow older, it will avoid you." - Winston Churchill

"I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap." - Bob Hope

"What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money." - Henny Youngman

"My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying." - Ed Furgol

"Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat." - Alex Levine

"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher." - Socrates

"Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, "Lillian, you should have remained a virgin." - Lillian Carter

"Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement." - Mark Twain

"The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible." - George Burns

A review of Sara Groves' CD: "Add to the beauty"

Sara Groves' "Conversations" CD is one of my all time favorites... I've listened to it 4 million times. And I only discovered it a year ago. With eager anticipation I bought her latest release, Add to the Beauty. It too is a woman singing really really good, memorable, heart stirring, meandering, melancholy songs. Kind of a Christian Joni Mitchell. (To sample all of her CD's go here.)

She is a cutie. Although the picture on the first page when you open the booklet looks like an anorexic ghost. (Like Steven Tyler of Aerosmith.)

Review of tracks...

1. When it was over

Interesting muse on the power of love in a relationship, and how it heals the other person. Musically it is so subtle though. I wish it had more of a punch to it. A little climax never hurt anybody.

Memorable lines...

• Love wash over a multitude of things. Make us whole.
• There is a love that never fails. There is a healing that always prevails. There is a hope that whispers a vow. A promise to wait while we're working it out.

2. Just showed up for my own life

Kinda cool, up beat, some energy. A woman deciding to live fully, freely, feeling, inspired, in the present. Inspired by the book, "Waking the Dead" by John Eldridge. There are a growing number of fans of this song.

Memorable lines...

• I was in love with an idea. Preoccupied with how a life should appear. Spending my time at the surface repairing the holes in the shiny veneer.
• There are so many ways to hide. There are so many ways not to feel. There are so many ways to deny what is real. And I just showed up for my own life.

3. You are the sun

A simple song about how God is the sun and we are the moon, and how we can't shine unless we turn our face toward him. That's it.

Memorable line...

• Without you I'm a cold dark stone.

4. It's gonna be alright

Another very simple song. Telling someone in pain that it will be alright eventually, and they will get stronger from it. (Not very deep.)

Memorable line...

• I did not come here to offer you cliches. I will not pretend to know of all your pain. Just when you cannot, then I will hold our faith, for you.

5. Add to the beauty

Quintessential Sara. Beautiful, haunting, lilting, meaningful. At times melodic tones spill out like a quiet waterfall. And then like a rushing, powerful river.

Memorable lines...

• Redemption comes in strange places, small spaces
• I want to shine with the light, that's burning up inside
• This is grace, an invitation to be beautiful. This is grace, an invitation.

6. Rewrite this tragedy

An appeal to stick with the relationship and work it out because we know "there's a better story." Very cool melodic line/rhythm at the beginning of each verse.

Memorable lines...

• Today I forgot a line in the play that you and I have been rehearsing since the day we met.
• It's the place we're going when we can't stay where we are.

7. Something changed

Her personal experience of deep, surprising, break-through healing. Musically stark. Sara at her bare bones basic.

Memorable line...

• And I cannot make it. And I cannot fake it. And I can't afford it. But it's mine.

8. How can I tell?

A fun expression about the frustration of trying to communicate the wonder of redemption in a way that makes the other "get it." This song has a faster pace, more deliberate beat, good change ups. Cool wah wah guitar during the bridge. (Like Bonnie Raitt.)

Memorable lines...

• And I cannot find the words. And sometimes it sounds absurd. And I don't even know myself all the depths the heights the wealth.
• So I'll expand my vocabulary. Spend some time at the local library. Analyze the archetypes. Anything to get this right.
• Cause the train that leaves the station is loaded down with connotation. And what you hear and what I say are night and day.
• Once upon a time, in a very, very far away land. Once upon a time, a long time ago, there was a man...

9. To the moon

Very short statement about a church that ups and decides to relocate to the moon, apparently to escape the difficulties of not fitting in here. I think? Not sure.

Memorable line...

• There'll be no one there to tell us we're odd. No one to change our opinions of God. Just lots of rocks and this dusty sod. Here in our church on the moon.

10. Kingdom comes

When we do small acts of kindness and obedience and trust and faith we are helping to build the kingdom of God on earth. Catchy chorus. I almost snapped my fingers!

Memorable line...

• That's a little stone. That's a little mortar. That's a little seed. That's a little water. In the hearts of the sons and daughters. This kingdom's coming.

11. Why it matters

Traditional contemplative Sara.

Memorable line...

• Sit with me and tell me again why it matters... beauty, power, love... in the midst of the ugliness and chaos and confusion.

12. Loving a person

A nice song about loving each other just as we are. I fell asleep before the end though. Can a song really have only 30 beats a minute?

Memorable lines....

• Love and pride can't occupy the same spaces baby.
• Loving a person just the way they are, that's no small thing. It's the whole thing.

13. Track 13 is a medley of several of the songs on the CD. A love theme.

Summary

An A (Conversations is an A+.) It will go down as one of my all-time favorites.